Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Day 528...i wAnnA mAtCh mY cAr!...

It is amazing how easy it is to get off track and neglect a blog.  After my lil sis asked me if I had caught up my posting last night and I said, "No.  I'm WAAAAAY behind."  I stopped to think about why I'm so eager to write sometimes and why it's so easy to NOT write at other times.  I have determined that when I am proud...or excited about what I'm doing...when I have a "plan...I want to write.  I make time to write.  When I'm feeling like I could be doing more (not due to ability, but due to desire) then it's really convenient to put it off.

My kids were sick and things just did not go as they normally do last week.  In hindsight, I still could've done more.  I have dumbells...and a medicine ball...and kettle bells, but I acted as though I was stuck at home with nothing but a recumbent bike and an elliptical.  That was the easy...convenient thing to do.  I'm not beating myself up...we all have those times...it's just that they are very few and far between for me...so it's really weird when it happens.

I'm not gonna spend hours trying to recount each day.  I'm puttin it behind me where it belongs and focusing on today.  Today I waited a bit before going to the gym, because I knew that J was having a "Foundations" (teaching the basic movements to new people) class for two new people.  I did not want to be in their way or be distracting.  It was 10:30 by the time I got there and 11 by the time I put all my stuff down...set up...and warmed up.  I decided to do a "Starting Strength" kind of day and then run at the park.

I did my first warmup set of Back Squats with just the bar, and then big E came in.  It was fun to see him all decked out in his Marine uniform.  He had stopped by to make a payment and of course we started chatting as well.  

Now I have to "back track" and say that I got a new car last week.  I am FINALLY officially OUT of a mini van!!!  Yea!  Not only am I excited to be out of a mini van, but I'm excited to be driving the car of my dreams...a Mercedes GL 450 (loaded)!!!  People's reactions have been interesting.  My family has been so excited and checked it out from "stem to stern"...others have very nicely congratulated me but not really expressed any desire to "look" at it...and still others (one of which has REALLY surprised me) have not even hardly mentioned it or even asked me about it or even glanced its way.  I hold nothing against anyone...it's a car for heaven's sake.  I think I expected a couple of people to actually wanna look at it, but when they didn't...I was fine with it.  So with that said, I'll get back to today...E comes in...walking forward but still looking back out at the parking lot where my new truck was parked...and immediately says, "YOU GOT IT?!?!" with the biggest smile on his face.  I said, "I did!!!  (HUGE smile) I guess my 'MOJO' is not broken after all!".  He laughed and said, "You are SO spoiled!".  I didn't disagree.  I expected nothing more from him...as this was more excitement that I had gotten out of anyone else.  I sat down to write out his receipt for the payment he was making and he said, "I just wanna see it!"  "See what?" I asked.  "Your new car!"  "Oh OKAY!" I said...surprised.  I gave him the keys and said, "You don't have to put them in.  You just have to have them with you.  It will sense the keys and unlock as soon as you touch the handle!" He smiled and said, "UH UH!!!  NO WAY!  Seriously?!?"  "YES!!!!" I said,  "I'm so excited!"  We went out and he checked it all out...sat in it...listened to everything I told him about it (like he actually cared and wanted to hear it).  Then he said, "This is SO nice.  I'm really happy for you." and I could tell he meant in.  I said, "Awww...THANKS!  I'm just so excited because in my almost 40 years, I have NEVER wanted...picked out...dreamed of a certain car...and then gotten it.  This is the first car I've ever really WANTED."  His reply, "Well then I'm even happier for you."  I just thought that was so nice...not that he was complimenting me...but that he was really happy for me.  It once again affirmed to me that I get to be around amazing people at our little gym...that we truly are a family of sorts.  E doesn't know it...but he made my day...not with compliments, but with sincerity and genuine happiness.

So once he left, I was feelin good...ready to work out.  I felt strong the whole time...like I coulda done MORE on my Back Squats and MORE on my Shoulder Presses.  I even felt REALLY good about my Power Cleans.  I was trying to do them all using the "hook grip" because I HATE the "hook grip" and I know that when J and I go to the Olympic Lifting cert in a couple of weeks with Coach Burgener, he will insist that we use it.  At first I was thinkin, "This is not so bad!  I'm able to get my elbows up faster and not 'muscle up the weight'."  Then I got to the set before my heavy workset...95 lbs...and it started to crumble.  I missed a few cleans..and I mean flat out MISSED them...dropped the bar....missed them.  Then I got to the work set and it was a real struggle.  Again...I missed at least one that I had to do again on every set.  I literally screamed and fought and practically clawed my way through the rest of the sets.  I wanted to give up...I was so mad.  It would've been easy to write a post about how bad "I suck" or how I hate the "hook grip" or Power Cleans...but I remembered something that made me CHOOSE to do things differently than I normally would.

Before he left, E and I stood at the door chatting and he said "NOW...your car matches you.".  At the time I thought it was so sweet and I was thinking about aesthetics...like "Yeah BABY!  I'm a MERCEDES of a woman!" (I didn't say that by the way)...but at the end of my workout, I thought..."You know what?...I DO match my car!...it's nice to look at...but what makes it an amazing vehicle goes far beyond the color of paint or the way it looks driving down the street.  It all the small things put together that make it special and it's the powerful engine that makes it "perform".  My friend W once said something like, "The way you workout and the kinds of things you do are more about guts than ability."  I believe that.

And THAT...is how I want people to think of me...I want people to know that there's so much more to me than what's on the outside and so I'm gonna keep goin even when things are "rocky" because I CAN.  I can perform...I just need to practice and not give up.  

He will never see this, but I have one last thing to say, "Thanks E!  Your kind words and your excitement truly made a difference in my day!"

500 M ROW



1 comment:

s said...

AWWW! that's so nice! i'm glad he came by and it seems that those people always pop up when you need them. you do match your car, lady. i know this and i hope someday you truly believe it about yourself too. we have a hard time with things that don't just come naturally. everyone does. i always tell my kids to not give up. i wish i would've heard that a lot more when i was a kid. anything that you do or have always means a lot more when you have to work hard to get it. big loves to my bestest big sis! muah! ps i'm so glad you posted. been looking & waitin! ;p